According to the Palm Bay Police Department in Brevard County, “the city has been plagued with burglaries in which the suspect cuts the screen or otherwise enters a victim’s back pool deck area and steals only pool floats.”
Court records in the Palm Bay-Melbourne-Titusville region of Florida say there have been an estimated 13 reports so far this year concerning this mysterious pool toy crime wave.
On June 5 an arrest was made when after a burglary was reported. A man was apprehended when police found him riding a bicycle carrying a garbage bag full of pool floats. The man had later taken police to an abandoned property where at least 75 pool floats had been stored.
The “defendant stated that he sexually gratifies himself with the pool floats instead of raping women,” the arrest report read.
I’ve got nothing.